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Comparative concern in open relationships

These days we are all about getting to know an awful lot about what people are doing in their bedrooms. We know more about Queer lifestyles and alternate romantic and sexual lifestyles than we have for decades.

 

What used to be secretive and titillating has become fascinating and liberating. The Queer community have led us to a broader acceptance of difference, and this in turn has helped all of us think of sexuality beyond the reduced functionality of reproduction.

 

An interesting article in Psychology Today highlights open relationships and some of the emotional struggles that those inside the open relationship experience. Comparative insecurity becomes a sophisticated delving into the connections we make with our lovers.

 

When we fall in love, we choose our mate and decide inside ourselves that no one will ever come close to the perfection they are. For those in monogamous relationships, you might spend a lot of time in your life justifying that choice.

 

Open relationships don’t necessarily change this. IN an open relationship, taking a lover that is nothing like your life partner is understandable. It is when your partner chooses someone very similar to you that certain insecurities can rise up.

 

Even age isn’t necessarily a big deal. An older couple can understand why each of them might want to enjoy sexual congress with a younger body. But if your mate chooses someone in the same age bracket or older, what are they looking for that you can’t provide?

 

Open relationships are wonderful and exciting, but they contain their own challenges.

 

You can read the article in Psychology today here.